Reaserch notes- "what is a woman?" Google search

So I searched this general question and I'm surprised at what I have found. this question itself was formulated after reviewing my work from when I began at OCAD till now, it is the question I subconsciously have been dealing with.

- How to master a woman's G-spot
Informative but not what I was searching for.

-Every woman is a cheating whore
Very sexist. "Getting attention from men is a woman’s lifeblood. That’s why women worship men in the form of menial tasks that they’re not very good at — because men control our attention like the gods of old controlled the sun and the crypt. We giveth and we can taketh away." The writer is either doing this deliberately or as a "joke". The site url menarebetterthanwomen.com makes it only worse. It is accompanied by articles such as why women hate sex and pets are not children. By the way the reasoning for why women hate sex is this "Women hate sex simply because they are lousy at it."... apparently. Oddly enough it reminds me of the oblivious men who are part of the mens club in Bleach (anime) and wonder why they are single (it's also hinted that they don't get laid either lol.).
I am highly amused by this site to the point where I want to write to Xtra-Toronto about this strange poor man.

-Why is a woman's Breast called a 'tit'?
Interesting wiki answer for this question. I still remember the fist time hearing it in High School, such an odd word. Women even use it.

- What is a woman to do? Age, Sex and Menopause
Definitely not what I was looking for but helpful in what another 20 years? Strangely there's an add for a memory game on it, was that deliberate?

-Sex, gender, and the body: the student edition of What is a woman?
Where has this book been all my life? It is so strange that there is no feminism lecture in High School for all the girls hitting puberty. I wish I had gotten this book instead I got the damned "what's happening to my body?" which explained where babies came from, what genitalia I have, what happens during sex (briefly, it's for 10-14 year old of course can't get them run off to experiment), what pads do, what tampons do, where hair grows now, and Why your different from men. Ah how I despised that book with it's odd drawings. (continued with other point)
-What is a woman?: and other essays

By Toril Moi
So I found the book twice. Anyhow. It has everything- Donna Haraway, Judith Butler&
Simone de Beauvoir. To name a few. If I had encountered this book earlier perhaps my questions
could have been answered more completely at an earlier age. Compleately being too broad a term
as it calls for an end, when I have only begun to fall down this "rabbit hole" of knowledge.

-What is a woman?
About.com article on such? I'm quite surprised. even more so at the definition that get's presented
from a blog
"WOMAN- The term `woman' means a female human being who is capable of becoming pregnant,
whether or not she has reached the age of majority."
This deffinition does not bring forth the differentiation between body and mind. Anyhow it continues
and the US Senate does not see someone who is female bodied-barren-woman as a woman. Has
this question been changed at all? There is no date on the post so I can not tell how old it is, but
there is a comment from 2008. Strange strange.

I'm going to stop my search there for the night and return to my books. Thesis paper is due on the
1st and I have yet to put together the information to create this piece. Back to my coffee for another
late night. <3 All my best <3

Back to my roots

So in the end after much debate I went back to ink, but with better paper. This series is much more enjoyable compared to my past work. With exception of my fetus series and cats cradle. There is something just simple and yet complex to the drawings that come out when I use sumi-e ink and Chinese brushes. Perhaps it is because I had so much "training" in water colour that it just comes naturally now or because of it's simplicity?
I an currently working on a rough copy for my artist statement, max 100 words or so for the catalog and I think it's 250 for the final copy. In addition I have to come up with a artist statement of 5 sentences max for my submission for the Retrospective show (due friday by 4pm). Things are slow to fall into place but things are getting there.
On another note I realized I'm near the end and I have done next to nothing for the paper, so I'm getting it going now. I also have a curatorial project to make a power point for (got it going so no big there) and an essay about Simone De Beauvoir for Modernism: Critical perspectives (I have everything I just need to pick out what I will use and start it). Even though there is a lot to do in such a short time I'm thankful that I have at least got things going.

Today I paid to stay for the summer or rather paid for august and I have to pay for the others as it comes up. I applied to jobs to stay, if all goes well I will hear back from someone soon. Well that was just a quick update on things that are going on. Back to writing! ( will post images of what is going on with my work soon<3)

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Now playing: Laibach - Nippon
via FoxyTunes

Holiday clean-up tommorow

I went home for a while but I'm back to tidy up my apartment and thesis studio. Going to work hard tonight to finish a portrait of my late Grandma for her husband. So far it looks Impressionist so It should turn out well as I know I can do that well. I will post pictures either tomorrow or later to night of it's progress.
On a side note I am going to work on studies for final works for thesis and do some drawings etc. I might even start the files for my photo series I want to do. Although I am wondering how much it will cost to print when I do it. Size is always an issue for me it seems when talking to peers about my work. I'll do some research on it and decide it all out before I compile everything together. I'm going to go make some tea and tidy up for dinner/lunch and my painting session <3>

Midyear citique over

I was told to work on the figure more and to try to put the same "power" from my black-n-white work into my new direction (I worded it nicely though). Too decorative but I need to work with colour harmony and meaning, I doubt I will work with meaning of colours but harmony/theory of colour is a definite.


I quite enjoy this new direction I am persueing, though I need to find new ways of applying the duck-tape or if I should stop useing it or paint on it. Catherine and Danniel said to leave as is, I like it but I guess (from Paul and Michele's recomendation I should look into meaning of it or find other ways for it to be used). The work below is the direction I am going to work with for the time being, though I plan to try out other possibilities in the mean time. Things I have in mind range from knitted series of "sculptures" and some photography collection series. I might start this Monday December 7th, I should work really on the projects I have to finish for Advanced Painting. More to come soon.

Studio- mess and progress

Studio progress/mess images. Working away at various things at the same time, thinking of heading out early to work on a writing assignment due this week and maybe write out more notes for Thesis Report. We will see how this goes.
The piece on the far left is for Advanced Painting, which I'm trying to work with the idea of the Cyborg in Donna Harraway's Cyborg Manifesto. Still have to come up with a composition for the figure. The piece beside it is putting two different images together, in this pieces's case it's a cover of a (I hate the term but,) Shemale pron magazine and a shot from some straight Porn review magazine. Inset duck tape and Voila.
I really adore the duck tape and what it refers to. Still playing with how I can add it to works or how I can subtract from it to add imagery. Really is open to alot of possibilities for me to work with.
Really anxious to go home, I think I have a cold or something from my unit mates on the north side of the apartment. Going to pack up now I guess and work the whole time tomorrow. Elizabeth get's back from Montreal tonight at 3am, so we will see how awake I can be for class. Have a good night everyone, wish me well.

working more on the body

After Wednesday and Thursdays critiques I've been working aggressively on various works. I hope to get about 10 works done by Halloween, various sizes. It's a goal, a good one at that.
I'm trying to get good-old-rough-copies of assignments that need to be done. If all works out, Monday will be a studio day. Tuesday, I am hopeing to head to the ROM for a few hours (2-3?) to see the Vanity Fair show. It's free for students to get in so I save 10$ ( I usually go on half price nights, aka friday).

This work I have though is done on Velum with charcoal. I really think I need to make a large version of one like it on the same paper. I am working with the ideas of Donna Haraway and her Cyborg. I quite like the construction of the body. The biology, the mechanics etc.

This other piece is in process, same idea but trying to use the same candy like colours in it. I started to use gel transfers as well, their prity interesting. Going to see how this piece goes.

This watercolor is done actually, but here is it before it was. It's at the studio, I will get around to documenting it soon. Really nice, I wonder what Catherine Will say about it. I'm off to bed, going to open tomorrow. Good Night world.

Candy ~ <3

I've been working on some new stuff as midterms are this week. My experimentation with ducktape has lead to the following works. The blue/teal/orange one is still being worked on. These paints, candy like, are so, well edible. I have been reading alot about pornography and how the female body functions. My reference recently has been playboy, which I really adore right now. The pink/neon green work is actually on packaging tape adhered to canvas. Because it was finicky , there are a lot of folds and crinkles in it, making the texture wonderful to work on. I am debating looking into finding ways to adhere saran wrap to the canvas, or just use it for texture, we'll see how that goes. The smaller work, which is WAY too shiny, might possibly get donated to WhoDun it?, I am not sure.

We'll I am off again to go do readings, either for thesis or my postmodern class. Latter.

Finnally some progress

I've been playing around the last little bit, materials as well as techniques. Here's some work that has come out of it all. All of which were fueled by my new reference material (Playboy, Curves and Glutes) of women, I do plan to get my hands on transgender imagery (non internet and tasteful, hopefully). I will be visiting both Glad day books and Stag Shop , to decide which is best image wise.

The first two are not for thesis , although I might re work them larger for it possibly. It is an option. Two works are actually on Styrofoam and the black-neon-green-orange one is on black Duck tape. Very interesting effects each surface gives to a work. I quite like the texture of the Styrofoam and duck tape. I'm deciding to possibly use packaging tape over a canvas I prepared for another work, we'll see how that goes. I'm off to sleep. Good night.

Thesis process-update

I took some images of my studio again. These were taken on Wednesday night. I really just wannted to put some images up to show my progress as well as process in a way.
The peice on wood is for my class with Dan Solomon, I might reproduce it for thesis in color and on canvas, maybe. Tommorow I am going to go to the studio for about an hour after classes. Just work more on the series I started, I might cut some paper and bring it back here to work on it. I really don't know. Nina is coming along slowly, which is the general idea since I'm trying to expand my vocabulary in techniques.
The series I started seems a bit vulgar and rude, but I guess that's the point. I'm thinking of doing 20 of them so working on them back home would be good as well. I bounced some ideas off of Amanda today and I think I will let this peice go and do what ever needs to be done with it (the one on wood). I think it has potential for a series of large works, meaning I might have to get that 3 feet by 6 feet piece of stone henge paper out. It migth just mysteriously disapear to the studio this weekend.
Although that would happen AFTER seeing some galleries.
I should sleep now, I'm beginning to ramble. Goodnight all <3

Final schedule for first semester

After complaining to myself about not haveing time to A: relax B: go to galleries C: go to the refrence library and D: go for my usual long walks which comprise of gallery hopping, I finnally planned out when and where I will be for most of the week.
Sunday is pretty much a day I can choose what to do and Saturday I have time to go for a nice long walk or even go home for lunch then go for a walk.
Tomorrow and Thursday are subject to change but this is my general plan right now.
Trying to save money on food by making it at home as opposed to buying it will help me save money for the New York Trip in the new year. Anyhow, I am going to eat and make a cup of Puerh tea from my Toucha (need to chip a piece off since it's a tea cake)

Past Work

Thought Id go over some past work before running off to put the laundry in the machine AND maybe buying a porn magazine for reference (Seriously...).
So this series was done last year in April. Cathy titled the project "Fear" and I really dislike the idea of being pregnant. This is the various stages of the fetus through pregnancy, done in Chinese ink on rice paper. 20 in all , each peice is 9 1/2 x 10 1/2 inches.







The next series was done again with Cathy, this time on childhood memories. When I was trying to learn "Cats Cradle" I continued to fail at it, getting to one point then getting stuck. I just really wanted to learn at the time, even now , sometimes, I will try to get past that point but I always fail. Chinese ink on Reeves paper 10 x 10inches roughly each.





This Diptych came from a sketch of a Tengu (Japanese mythological being). I came up with a story in my head about this captured beast and a young woman falling in love with this creature. Does it tear her to shreds? Does it love her back? Does it know what love is? Does it understand her? Many questions went though my mind of this strange relationship. It reminded me of how my girlfriend and I are seen by others, as she has transitioned and looks gorgeous (I guess people are jealous of me for having her?). Perhaps I understand this woman more than my peers did in my class, no one liked it , except for Cathy if I recall correctly. The second peice next to it, with the creature being absent, shows how maybe she imagined it. Sometimes I hear Elizabeth's (My girlfriend) voice, but how can I when I am in Toronto and she is in little Bowmanville? So perhapse this woman's longing for something "abnormal" or "new" made her dream up this creature (which personally I think is awsome by the way). Also Chinese ink on paper, and tissue paper. 18 by 20? I think.



I am currently trying to work on this series. I am attempting to depict the stages of transition for FTM, but simplified. The last one is ment to be a post-op chest or Male chest, I have not decided what of those two yet.
Charcoal/pastel +oil. on NO idea what size canvases (their at the studio).



Very graphic depiction of what I refer to as " misconceptions of Sexual reassignment surgery".
That's pritty much all it is, to me, but I guess it could be about feminism as well.
Acrylic on 18x 18 inch canvas, with collage.








Last one for tonight- Remember. This was done last year in October in remembrance of those who died. All of the subjects are trans or went outside of gender roles in some way or form, subjected to hate crimes. Remember Our Dead was my refrence for this series of portraits done in acrylic. 20- 4x4 inch canvases. I am deciding still if I should do more or not. I think my goal would be to do a whole wall of them.


Anyhow I hope those of you who check out my blog enjoyed that. I'm off to do laundry, (yey) and make tea. Hope your night is well.

Studio Space for Thesis

I'm currently working away at a new series of 5x6 inch sumi-e paintings. My current refrence is here, (warning, get your kids away from the computer). Anyhow. I picked up bordercrossings to read the interview with Ghada Amer, who "paints" with emboidery on canvas. Wonderful work. Anyhow I looked up all of the artists mentioned in the interview and then came up with this series. Now lets just see where this goes. I'm slightly worried about reception of my peers and the faculty, but then again I always am. Now I'm going to eat a bit then work some more. <3

Work Presentation

It went well. I showed "IT", although on my laptop. Really wish I brought the real thing. Paul Sloggett suggested to maybe turn to video or photography for my thesis. I'm really unsure about photography, I'd rather produce something by hand if I can.
On another note the night before I spent time takeing pictures of my work, time wasted in a way, but it will be put to good use. If he did not say show one, then I would of shown my mini slide-show with some real works as well. I will talk to him latter perhaps, I really need to sign up for critique next week.
I really look forward to this weekend to work in my new space. I just need to get my ID authorized since it does not work. That is what needs to be done today. I should be on latter to post the other new images of past work.

Looking at past work

Well I put everything out and looked at it today. I picked out six that will be shown to my faculty advisior, which ever of the two I end up haveing. It is supriseing how much get's done in such a short time.
I'm kind of hitting a block recently but seeing all of this helped. I am going to do some excesises tonight that Cathy Daley taught me last year. One being writing down everything that comes to mind, riping it up and throwing it out- Purgeing the mind. The other is doing a short drawing per minute for like 15-30 minutes. Then there's also picking a word and doing drawings related to that. We will see what happens.
I'm currently doing laundry and trying to decide what I believe that Post-Modernism is, for a small 250 word opinion peice. Although I'm trying to think of how to word my Thesis proposal and what I am going to do.
I warned my parents of the NYC trip at the end of October (Oct 29-Nov 1) with my program, Dad was a bit upset (money) and Mom was excited (she wants pictures taken). Money is an issue but we will see how things go.
Looked at the MOMA webpage and it makes me want to go more. Monet's Waterlilies are showing, back from London I believe. There's alot of Cezanne, of whom I adore. Picasso's collages. Kara Walker's work as well.
Who knows what will happen from now till then though.
I just made some Matcha tea. The cheep stuff leaves a powdery taste in my mouth, I like the can from David's Tea better. My technique with the whisk is better I must say. I am going to go enjoy the rest of this cup as I now wait for the dryer to be done. Good Night.

Almost end of a long day

Today I attended(attending or waiting more so for the latter) Post-Modern perspective & Art Writing Workshop. Almost at the end of a long week, I look forward to Gongfu Tea session after, in addition to reading required texts. Assignments need to be completed ,or considered and studies need to be done.
Thesis went well. I have to present my past work next week. Although I switched studios, from room 430(100 McCaul) to the 205 Richmond St studio ( there was a $50 deposit for the other room, money I need for food). Because of this my thesis adviser is changing.
I cleaned up my room studio and set out work to photograph for presentation next Thursday. These images will be posted here as well.
I have been reading Sun Tzu's Art of War in preparation of thesis. It has helped me mentally prepare for the work I want to do.

Class is starting in less than an hour so I will stop here. Wish me luck.